Disclaimer: I am not sure if I am correct on any of this.
It was hard to take note and remember everything too.Dear,
Poems and Poets at the Podium, I Will Not Forget. 4-8-2014. K-5
Brian`s poem , Letter To Self, was like a wake-up call to my-self. The seven deadly sins symbolized in the piece go well with Brian`s depth of darkness in his details. The imagery of a mother being buried in a cold December rain, in 1999, is a detail complementary to the depth of darkness in his details. Just to let you know that Brian also brings a hell/underworld into this piece by using words like Hades and brimstone. He uses the words “like” gluttony, greed, sloth, pride, envy, lust, and anger . . . highlights the seven deadly sins. What I walk away with, from this piece is I cannot blame others for where I have faltered and I need to make changes to deal with it.
Sam`s poem, Dear Muse, is like living in the mind of a fun loving stalker who does not really love muse but needs to for a front, “holding back lying”, “hope live is known”, but it is a secret. And at the end closing, is a torturous bitch. I enjoy hearing Sam`s voice in class. She is so super cool.
Flo`s letter poem had a sort of Cinderella-ish ending with a kiss at 12:00 at the New Year’s Eve party with a narrator that is in tears. The absence of love, rejection, and memorabilia, like the hoody, gave me the feeling that the narrator was a sort of hopeless romantic that in the end gets a kiss that brings tears. This kiss and tears could be that action that reflects the narrator’s story. I liked the use of “thunderstorm” as well. I like the quality that nature brings to a piece.
Tyson`s, A Letter To Jack From Ohio, was an attack on what at first seemed to be a person named jack, but at the end I realized that “Jack” was short for “Jack-Frost” winter. It is like an anti-ode to the cold weather of Ohio. Interesting way to mind fuck a reader. I like it.
Coral`s piece, Depression Speaks, Lights on the Tree, great use of symbolism with lights and metaphorically giving the lights human qualities which in the end are depressing to the narrator, because it is like the reminding lights of bad times. I agree with Mike, “she is brave”, and also with Brian, “It is not easy to do a personal piece”. Coral`s piece is a reminder to me that I have good things going on in my life, like college and poetry, but there are lots of hardships in life that are hard to deal with and whatever triggers my depression can give me strength in a poem.
Remi`s, Dear You, showed the shyness of the narrator. The description of her is kind of fun because she has eyes, hair and a smile of diamond moons, twinkle glass suns and locks of golden honey. The feelings the narrator gets from this girls is that she is powerful and gives a good vibe just like coffee and she is the “best thing ever”. The problem for the narrator is that he has not told her that he likes her because the narrator is rather to shy or the reason is that she is already in a relationship. The power of her cuteness in this piece is, what I believe, the main problem for the narrator to overcome. The piece was like golden honey in a sun glass of twinkling diamond moon with vibrations of cuteness.
Ammar`s, mom letter, piece was cool for many reasons, but what stood out for me was the repetition of “seven billion people” and that the narrator only has one person out of all of those people that is the narrator`s mother. The mother sounds awesome in this piece with the provision by giving the narrator the needs like diapers, sleep, food and putting up with that narrator`s bad choices. I liked this piece and am glad at the end that the narrator appreciates mom.
Jana`s, mom letter, piece had a nice story from a narrator`s memory of mom back in kindergarten on a first day when the narrator was scared and missed his mom and started to cry. The school called the narrator`s mom and she came there and calmed the cries. Then Jana takes a leap in time in the piece and tells the story of the time when the narrator was leaving mom and dad to go to college. I like the symmetry of tears as the mother cries and the narrator did in kindergarten. I do think that this is as well a letter to dad as briefly as dad is mentioned. The dad saying, “time to be a man”, is a powerful part in the piece. In the end I am left to wonder if the narrator`s mother will be comforted someday like she did for the narrator, but this time the narrator will have the strength of a man that he had become. College is not easy and if I were any of these poet`s parents, I would be quite proud.
Maggie`s narrative piece was scary with the effect of revenge with a crowbar and the gurgle sound. I wondered about the person vs. materials subject in this piece. Was someone about to die and someone wanted the materials that were left? Did the narrator take the crowbar to a person with material interest or to a door or something to get the materials before they did? Was the “I have all I need from him” the act of carrying out the last wishes of the deceased? I do not know and that is what gave the piece some suspense. I liked the line “slate stone stairs”. I appreciate good alliteration.
Sarah`s narrative piece was another thriller with the car accident and the appreciation that the narrator has for life after surviving those seconds of what was wished to be “a bad dream” moment. I liked the imagery of nature with the river tears and the thoughts of being home. It makes me think about those moments I have experienced that could have been “the end”.
David`s narrative piece was very detailed and I felt effects of synesthesia when listening to him at the podium. It is not that his diction was of colors like red, white and blue, but rather his words showed colors in the “movie of my mind”. For example, what do you see when you hear that cold then really hot shower? I see blue and red in my head. Clinic equaled white. And then there was the beauty. The most distinctive of color, though, was “blond”. The “Blond beauty” was like an angel to the narrator and also disclaims any other love other than conditional and comforting love. This piece leaves me with the notion that both the narrator and the beauty are angels. Nice work.
Katie`s, “Sun Rise” piece was full of color like, orange pumpkin pink blobs in the sky of light blue. I loved the color and the location indications like “dock” and “Lake Erie”. The narration was very full circle as far as the details go, a “perfect breathtaking moment”. I wondered if the narrator watched every sunrise, every day. I really enjoyed the sunrise here in Katie`s piece.
Sirk`s, “Unfinished Thoughts #2”, poem was cool, because he references Vivaldi. “Dear Summer” sounds like a good title, too. I was sorry not to get more of Sirk`s work into my earholes. I guess it is “wrong to loath for sleeping dreams of you with smiles you bring like joyous symphonies from school of birds like Vivaldi”, cool to see what was working in the piece. O, Yes, and I cannot forget to mention his use of nature in the piece. I like birds.
I could not choose two poets. I hope I don`t get dinged for this! Joke! Thank all of you for sharing an experience in college poetry class this semester.
P.S. Special thanks to Mike
For all the help in learning.
You are appreciated.